things have been a little crazy lately. there is an issue in my life that i hate dealing with. but aside from that everything is great. i am going to try to be a positive person. i have a wonderful husband, a perfect son, a great family/support system, a decent job, and we are 2 months ahead on bills. things actually really aren't that bad. granted every now and again something happens that makes me ask myself, "why me?" but those are things that are thrown at me to make me stronger. my marriage has never been better. dusty has been amazing. making phone calls, dealing with issues, he does everything he can to make things as easy and stress free on me as possible. he makes me laugh when i feel like i could never laugh again. corbin is a little angel. best baby ever. he is very independent, he is a good eater, he loves his bath time, he sleeps til 10:30 every morning. he is perfect. my family has been amazing too. i always have someone i can talk to. no matter what is going on i know i can call and get someone to listen to me rage for a few minutes. help me get things off my chest. so i know i need to be positive. i know that there are people dealing with things i could never imagine in this world, probably even in this neighborhood, so i just need to relax. it can always be worse. really i almost feel like i have been a bit of a whiner because i know i have everything i want in my life. (besides a nook!)
my birthday is next month! i feel bad saying this to dusty but i feel like i am getting old! (dusty is 7 years my senior.) i am going to be 23, which is almost 25, which is mid twenties, which is almost 30, which is almost 40, which is middle aged! i know that is a bit dramatic but i can't believe i am almost to the halfway point of my twenties. best years of your life they say. these are definetely the best years of my life. i know with dusty and corbin and maybe a couple more rugrats running around it will only get better. yes i said maybe a couple more. dusty wants 3!!! oh lord i don't know what i would do with 2, let alone 3!!! if i have a girl next, that is it. we are done. i will have a boy and a girl and she will have a big brother that will keep tabs on her for dusty. that will be perfect. (dusty wants to rig GPS to our daughters car, if we have one. yes he will be one of those crazy dads.) if we have another boy next, i might want to try one more time for a girl. if i don't get a girl, well then i have a pack of boys and i am obviously not meant to have a daughter. honestly i will not be the least bit suprised if i end up with a clan of boys. dirty, stinky boys. can you imagine when they are all teenagers!!!???
i am excited for my actual birthday though. we are heading out west again. i know, i know. but we really LOVE wendover. it is the perfect little getaway for us. we both love to gamble, and it is nice to just jump in the car and be there in 2 hours. we don't have to pack anything. all you need is a pocket full of cash and a full tank of gas. we probably don't even need a room but it is nice to know if you get tired and want to go to bed there is a room waiting for you. if your dusty you don't spend more than 10 mintues in the room, but me, i like my sleep. dusty likes to stay up all night and play. i love not having to worry about how many seats are open on a plane and if i going to make it, and what if i don't, what if i get stuck and on and on. not worth it to me for a quick little getaway. it is so nice to have a husband that likes all same things i do. we both love rodizio, if we go out to eat it isn't even a discussion. we know where we are going to go. we both love the same movies, both of us are movie buffs, we both love road trips, we both love family guy, we both love to get a sitter every once in a while and go out drinkin and letting loose a little bit, we both have the same goals, we both know what we want from life, we are both great parents, we both love our families. when we go to wendover we both like to do it the same way. i think if anyone went with us they would be very annoyed, or very bored. we like to move around alot. we only play penny games, never tables. we are both totally content sitting next to eachother playing the games. i really think dusty is my perfect match. we are perfect for eachother. i know. thats enough of that. it is hard for me to not rave about dusty because he really is that great. he gave me corbin. best thing we have ever done is be irresponsible young people and end up with our beautiful baby boy. he wasn't planned. i know that is how it was meant to happen. he was meant to come into our lives when he did. it really gave us that kick in the ass we needed to grow up. when he came it was when we really started to get serious about buying a house. we didn't think we could do it. but we did. we knew it was time. it took a year after he was born for us to actually move in but i don't know where we would be if i didn't get pregnant with corbin. i think we would of bought a house. it would have been alot smaller. we would probably go out a lot drinkin and going to wendover all the time. ( i mean drinking and wendover like every weekend) yeah it would of been fun but it wouldn't be anything compared to the joy i get when i can make corbin laugh til he lets out that cute little scream. it would have been nothing compared to how happy it makes me when dusty wakes up first and comes and puts corbin in bed with me to get me up. it wouldn't have come close to when corbin says "mama" and "dada". my point is, i am one of those people who believe everything happens for a reason. even the bad things. i was in a car accident, (a really bad one) when i was 15. i had a very serious concussion. after i went back to school i had some serious learning problems. it wasn't that i was stupid, i would just think i retained the information and i could ace that test. i would take the test think i did amazing, the get it back with a D or an F. it was heartbreaking. i went from having straight As 4.0 to Ds and Fs and a pathetic little 2.7. it was awful. my brain didn't want to work the same way it did before. i dropped out of school. i know if i wouldn't of been in that car accident i would have got a full ride scholarship to the school of my choice. i could of been anything. BUT i never would of gone to work for skywest. i never would of met dusty. i never would of been blessed with corbin. i wouldn't change a thing. i believe in fate and all that. everything happens for a reason. i am a firm believer. it is fate that i am sitting in this house, waiting for dusty to walk through the door, thinking about going up stairs to peak in on corbin. fate gave me this house, my amazing husband, my beautiful boy. i know a lot of people don't believe in fate. thats fine. but i do. in MY life. i have never had to go through anything to make me question that, and god willing i won't.
oh man this has turned into another epic blog post and it is time to sign off! true blood is calling my name...

things have been a little crazy lately. there is an issue in my life that i hate dealing with. but aside from that everything is great. i am going to try to be a positive person. i have a wonderful husband, a perfect son, a great family/support system, a decent job, and we are 2 months ahead on bills. things actually really aren't that bad. granted every now and again something happens that makes me ask myself, "why me?" but those are things that are thrown at me to make me stronger. my marriage has never been better. dusty has been amazing. making phone calls, dealing with issues, he does everything he can to make things as easy and stress free on me as possible. he makes me laugh when i feel like i could never laugh again. corbin is a little angel. best baby ever. he is very independent, he is a good eater, he loves his bath time, he sleeps til 10:30 every morning. he is perfect. my family has been amazing too. i always have someone i can talk to. no matter what is going on i know i can call and get someone to listen to me rage for a few minutes. help me get things off my chest. so i know i need to be positive. i know that there are people dealing with things i could never imagine in this world, probably even in this neighborhood, so i just need to relax. it can always be worse. really i almost feel like i have been a bit of a whiner because i know i have everything i want in my life. (besides a nook!)
my birthday is next month! i feel bad saying this to dusty but i feel like i am getting old! (dusty is 7 years my senior.) i am going to be 23, which is almost 25, which is mid twenties, which is almost 30, which is almost 40, which is middle aged! i know that is a bit dramatic but i can't believe i am almost to the halfway point of my twenties. best years of your life they say. these are definetely the best years of my life. i know with dusty and corbin and maybe a couple more rugrats running around it will only get better. yes i said maybe a couple more. dusty wants 3!!! oh lord i don't know what i would do with 2, let alone 3!!! if i have a girl next, that is it. we are done. i will have a boy and a girl and she will have a big brother that will keep tabs on her for dusty. that will be perfect. (dusty wants to rig GPS to our daughters car, if we have one. yes he will be one of those crazy dads.) if we have another boy next, i might want to try one more time for a girl. if i don't get a girl, well then i have a pack of boys and i am obviously not meant to have a daughter. honestly i will not be the least bit suprised if i end up with a clan of boys. dirty, stinky boys. can you imagine when they are all teenagers!!!???
i am excited for my actual birthday though. we are heading out west again. i know, i know. but we really LOVE wendover. it is the perfect little getaway for us. we both love to gamble, and it is nice to just jump in the car and be there in 2 hours. we don't have to pack anything. all you need is a pocket full of cash and a full tank of gas. we probably don't even need a room but it is nice to know if you get tired and want to go to bed there is a room waiting for you. if your dusty you don't spend more than 10 mintues in the room, but me, i like my sleep. dusty likes to stay up all night and play. i love not having to worry about how many seats are open on a plane and if i going to make it, and what if i don't, what if i get stuck and on and on. not worth it to me for a quick little getaway. it is so nice to have a husband that likes all same things i do. we both love rodizio, if we go out to eat it isn't even a discussion. we know where we are going to go. we both love the same movies, both of us are movie buffs, we both love road trips, we both love family guy, we both love to get a sitter every once in a while and go out drinkin and letting loose a little bit, we both have the same goals, we both know what we want from life, we are both great parents, we both love our families. when we go to wendover we both like to do it the same way. i think if anyone went with us they would be very annoyed, or very bored. we like to move around alot. we only play penny games, never tables. we are both totally content sitting next to eachother playing the games. i really think dusty is my perfect match. we are perfect for eachother. i know. thats enough of that. it is hard for me to not rave about dusty because he really is that great. he gave me corbin. best thing we have ever done is be irresponsible young people and end up with our beautiful baby boy. he wasn't planned. i know that is how it was meant to happen. he was meant to come into our lives when he did. it really gave us that kick in the ass we needed to grow up. when he came it was when we really started to get serious about buying a house. we didn't think we could do it. but we did. we knew it was time. it took a year after he was born for us to actually move in but i don't know where we would be if i didn't get pregnant with corbin. i think we would of bought a house. it would have been alot smaller. we would probably go out a lot drinkin and going to wendover all the time. ( i mean drinking and wendover like every weekend) yeah it would of been fun but it wouldn't be anything compared to the joy i get when i can make corbin laugh til he lets out that cute little scream. it would have been nothing compared to how happy it makes me when dusty wakes up first and comes and puts corbin in bed with me to get me up. it wouldn't have come close to when corbin says "mama" and "dada". my point is, i am one of those people who believe everything happens for a reason. even the bad things. i was in a car accident, (a really bad one) when i was 15. i had a very serious concussion. after i went back to school i had some serious learning problems. it wasn't that i was stupid, i would just think i retained the information and i could ace that test. i would take the test think i did amazing, the get it back with a D or an F. it was heartbreaking. i went from having straight As 4.0 to Ds and Fs and a pathetic little 2.7. it was awful. my brain didn't want to work the same way it did before. i dropped out of school. i know if i wouldn't of been in that car accident i would have got a full ride scholarship to the school of my choice. i could of been anything. BUT i never would of gone to work for skywest. i never would of met dusty. i never would of been blessed with corbin. i wouldn't change a thing. i believe in fate and all that. everything happens for a reason. i am a firm believer. it is fate that i am sitting in this house, waiting for dusty to walk through the door, thinking about going up stairs to peak in on corbin. fate gave me this house, my amazing husband, my beautiful boy. i know a lot of people don't believe in fate. thats fine. but i do. in MY life. i have never had to go through anything to make me question that, and god willing i won't.
oh man this has turned into another epic blog post and it is time to sign off! true blood is calling my name...